Yes, Down My Pants. Oh, Like You Haven't?

In case you don't know, Sandy Berger is a Harvard law School graduate who spent 15 years practicing law at Hogan & Hartson, one of Washington's top law firms. He subsequently served as Assistant to the President for National Security Affairs during the Clinton years.

By virtue of his background, Berger is an expert at the discovery, retention and production of sensitive and/or highly classified documents. Anyone who believes that he "inadvertently" walked out with secret documents stuffed in his pants and then "misplaced" them is a fool.

So Berger knew what he was doing. But why did he do it? Was he trying to bury evidence that he and his boss mishandled the growing terrorist threat during the 1990's? Or did he want to deprive Bush supporters of facts they could use against Kerry? Maybe both. Whatever the case, the authorities should nail him to the wall, preferably before the election.


http://clinton4.nara.gov/WH/EOP/NSC/html/bergerbio.html

Posted by Jonathan at July 20, 2004 1:24 PM

Pres. Bush is a grad of Yale and Harvard Business. Pat Robertson has a JD from Yale Law. Degrees don't seem to prevent people from being or doing...

Regarding nailing him, alert Mel it will be a great docudrama.

Posted by Charles Croninger at July 20, 2004 1:39 PM

Charles -

Did you just try to conect the Pres and a "man of the cloth" (who both may have their share of "crimes" in theirr closets...) to a man who admits to removing CLASSIFIED documents from the storage vault (I assume the room is vault-like)?

That is absurd. When you are caught doing something stupendously stupid you only make it worse by saying something equally dumb, like for example "That depends on the definition of 'is'."

Time to grow up..... Bush has his faults, but this crime isn't one of them.

Posted by Tom_with_a_dream at July 20, 2004 2:34 PM

They're certainly working on making it Bush's fault. :P
But Kerry's spokesman Phil Singer released a statement to FOX News, questioning the timing of the report.

"This appears to be a partisan attempt to divert attention away from the 9/11 commission report. Instead of using the report's recommendations to learn how we can improve our homeland security, Republicans are playing politics with a criminal investigation. That's wrong, and in November voters will have a choice on the ballot between a candidate they can trust and a president that continues to mislead the nation," he said.

Posted by Michael at July 20, 2004 4:02 PM

Michael -

Right On! (Apologies and deleted text are in order to Michael... I had missed the quotes and thought Michael was telling us it was Bush's fault. Sorry, glad I re-read your post.)

I will concede to the Kerry spokesman the timing of the release. I believe the Berger incident happened 6-9-ish months ago, is this right? If so, why do we find out now? I hav not researched this although my wife did ask... Any help?

Too bad the Kerry spokesman didn't assign names to his phantom candidates, then we wouldn't have to assume. I am certain the candidate I can trust is Bush, not Kerry (We can all find the letter he wrote to a Vet saying 'We should not have gone to war' and the other letter he wrote to the same Vet saying 'I will go to war'. They call Kerry a flip-flopper for a reason....

I notice this - "Republicans are playing politics with a criminal investigation."
I thought the commission was to be a fact-finding panel to attempt ot uncover where the lapses were and, most importantly, how we can seal them so they don't happen again (musicians of an un-named foriegn band notwithstanding).

As for whether Bush has "mis-led the nation" I am getting the feeling that this is being settled pretty conclusively, especially when I see the "News Networks" covering the Martha and Kobe parties so consistently.

Again, sorry to Michael!

Posted by Tom_with_a_dream at July 20, 2004 5:39 PM

Tom,

You are right. No comparison, Sandy has admitted his mistake.

Posted by Charles Croninger at July 20, 2004 6:23 PM

I guess he shouldn't serve his 10 years in prison then. He has, afterall, admitted to theft of national security documents. I guess all is right in the world again....

Posted by Tom_with_a_dream at July 21, 2004 7:57 AM

How is this 'a misdemeanor'? The classified stuff I used to handle was plainly stamped with warnings that failure to treat it properly was a felony. Humor-challenged young men with firearms were in the vicinity at all times, leading me to suspect that the actual consequences of strolling out with loose documents might go farther than a long prison sentence.

Posted by F451 at March 31, 2005 6:32 PM

Misdemeanor? Yeah, right. If I had done anything near what Berger did, they would have fired my arse right out the door and I would be facing majorly prison time. When it comes to document security, there must be a two-tier system: those politically connected and the rest of us.

Posted by Howard Larson at March 31, 2005 6:40 PM

Well, it's not like he put them in his socks or anything.

So, let's see. He did you one better--he took the documents out in his
jacket and pants and a leather portfolio. I wonder how he decided which papers would go where?

And yet it's all an "honest mistake." The mind reels.

Posted by neo-neocon at March 31, 2005 8:16 PM

Mr. Berger will be doing endorsements for the Jockey underwear company. He will be using the proceeds to explain the nuances of his document handeling. There will also be a discussion of his Constitutional rights vis a vis emanations of penumbra.

Posted by Dennis at March 31, 2005 8:54 PM

I say he should have a whole line of undies for the serious reader/klepto. Fruit of the Reading Room: Bookie briefs! Book Bag Boxers! Athletic supporters for all that heavy reading!
An honest mistake...must ...stop...laughing...

Great post.

Posted by Quid at April 1, 2005 8:25 AM

It never fails, there's always someone willing to excuse a crime like theft and wilfull destruction of classified documents with a dumb joke at the expense of the opposition.

Croninger, you are a complete and utter jackass.

Posted by Stevely at April 1, 2005 3:22 PM

I believe things like this will continue as long as the word "allegedly" precedes every conviction. 2 witness actually saw the robber pull the gun and shoot . . . but it's reported the robber "allegedly" shot the store owner. I can get away with murder as long as I sort of didn't do it.

jamescalvin

Posted by james at April 8, 2005 9:23 AM

------------
"...Right after your father gets home."
------------

I am 53 years old, and I managed to heal myself of the years of living in fear of my father. The above quoted words ruined my day, thank you.

Posted by Mr Jones at October 14, 2006 6:25 AM

He was a wispy simulacra of William Burroughs with the gray haze of alcohol hovering about him and a tendency to give me a smile that was a little too warm whenever I came into the shop
Going by that description, it probably was the real William Burroughs!

Posted by Fausta at October 15, 2006 7:23 AM

Mine was a packet of Kool-Aid in my shorts; I was five.

I, too, did time in my room waiting for the Doom to come home from work.

Those words used to invoke rightful terror; I wonder if parents know they're even 'allowed' to use that tool anymore.

And I spent the entire summer, at five, in my room, in bed, no TV, no nothin'; allowed out for meals and bathroom only.

Posted by Cindi at October 15, 2006 9:38 AM

What a hilarious and rich look back at your early Sandy Berger moment before later role models polished their talents on the national political stage.

Sadly, I had to face my own criminal nature at a much younger age, 4 or 5, when I not only took something under false pretenses, but also perjured myself in the aftermath.

It had to do with a project my best friend, Patti, and I had conjured up one summer afternoon in our back yards. I will write about it one day on my own new blog under the title of "Slop-Ma-Doodle." But suffice it to say, the powers-that-be, my parents to be exact, were not amused in the slightest when my criminal creativity showed up in full view for all the neighborhood to see.

Mother said that when my father got home we would settle the matter in a variety of ways, with the punishment of "switching" being a "certainty."

I, too, considered several quick exits from existence as I went into a time warp that made the rest of the afternoon seem like it was being lived in slow motion. I had never been switched before, but I knew that it would be A, if not THE, low point of my young life so far.

So I hatched a plan which involved hiding under the big guestroom 4-poster bed, behind the dust ruffle and hoping I could outlast them. Survival of the fittest was foremost on my little delusional mind.

When my father came home from work, I'm sure he had already been apprised of my unacceptable behavior and had hatched his own little plan to punish and surely keep his errant daughter from one day landing in a federal prison somewhere: He hammed it up. He was a great practical joker, and so he combined justice with high drama.

After a chat of discovery, he informed me that as soon as he changed his shoes, he would be going outside to find the perfect switch and then he would allow me to decide where justice would be served me. And then he left the room.

I ran off to the guestroom where I stood at the windows and watched in horror as he cut a large switch off a nearby forsythia bush. Then he took out his pocket knife and scraped all the buds off the branch before he whipped it through the air in a Zorro-like fashion.

So scared was I that I almost couldn't carry out my escape plan. But as he turned to come back in the house with THE SWITCH, red alert activated flight mode in my reptilian brain.

I dove under the bed, behind the dust ruffle, scambling between storage boxes like a little marsupial going to hibernate in the deepest, darkest place it could find. Then silence and stillness overtook me.

Let the rest of the story be left to the imagination. In the end, after much waiting, my father gave me the ultimatum of surrendering sooner rather than later thereby saving myself an even greater punishment yet to be disclosed.

When I crawled out, and took my took my medicine, it was anticlimatic: three maybe four light swats and it was all over. Then, with a twinkle in his eye he said he hoped I would never pull such a stunt again and walked out of the room.

This episoade had profound and lasting effects on my wayward nature. And who knows where else Sandy Berger would have been that day at the National Archives, if he'd had been with me that day many years ago making slop-ma-doodle.


Posted by Webutante at October 15, 2006 1:50 PM

I wonder if Sandy Berger thought losing his reputation was worth it?

Posted by Fontessa at December 2, 2015 10:19 AM

Depends on what reputation means.
I suspect at Bergers level reputation means something different than for regular people.

Posted by ghostsniper at December 2, 2015 11:50 AM

As The Prophet Neal Boortz observed,
Adios Mouther Fracker

Posted by Scott M at December 2, 2015 4:59 PM

Did he die at home or Ft. Marcy Park? Did he serve his country or the Clintons?

Posted by Dave J at December 2, 2015 5:26 PM

The company I work for performs Government work that is Classified. If I sneaked out some Classified information in my shorts (or put it on a thumb drive, like Hillary)or even spoke about it to another person with clearance but had NO NEED TO KNOW I would be fired and talking to the FBI, probably in reverse order. We go through repeated training in the handling of Classified information. Sandy or Hillary "forgot" and mishandled it? Pfffft.

Posted by Snakepit Kansas at December 2, 2015 6:38 PM

one more down...many to go, just another big fat pig that helped destroy the Republic

Posted by m rapp at December 2, 2015 8:13 PM

Good riddance. Don't let the door hit you in the ass on the way out, Sandy.

Posted by waltj at December 4, 2015 9:48 AM