Around here they say, "he passed". All my life I've wondered, passed what? So far, all I've ever passed was gas.

And it was his lefty hippy-dippy buddies and fellow travelers who foisted on us the bogus politically correct language he ridicules.

My "healthcare provider" wanted to let me know I'm fat (as if my circumference approaching my height didn't tell me that already). He said I was morbidly obese. I told him that, actually, I had still kept my sense of humor, so I was actually "cheerfully obese."

You're not fat, you're well fed.

We old pilots don't pass away, we "Fly West." We fly to the big hangar in the sky, where the beer's always cold and people laugh at your corny jokes. (Heaven?)

Yep, we like the hard edges knocked off of reality.